Monday, November 22, 2010

Deciphering (Random Word Pick From Poetry by Pablo Neruda

Word Trigger Exercises.

Southern Comforts, deciphering the code. 
Skills for deciphering your southern spouse.
There is always a catch when trying to decipher what a southerner says. Whatever they say, it's never what they are saying.  
"he does not know shit from shinola". That's a great one. I asked my MIL what it meant. She replied "I have no idea" and giggling, presuablely at me, for not knowing how to speak southern. 
The catch is that underneath the saying, there could possibly be an insult waiting for me. 
"She could scare a cat off a gut wagon" - that's pretty self explanatory. 
Starting a sentence with "Bless her/his heart..." is never good. It usually always followed by something negative, in southern code speak. 
For example  'bless her heart, she could scare a cat off a gut wagon'.  
See? Not good. 
Deciphering Part II
His look was impossible to deciper. In one way he looked focuused, determined but with wrinkled forehead and his eye brow touching like that, he could very well be pissed off. 
Then of course his bag as by the door. 
He was due home today but that was hours ago. 
Why was the bag still packed, and by the door. 
Decipehring Part III
If I were a boy of say ten or eleven, I would save all my proof of purchase and mail in for that secret decoder ring advertized in almost all of the popular comic books. Then in 4 to 6 weeks, I would use that ring to to decipher all the big mysteries of guys. I wonder though if a tool from the behind the magic curtain of men could be used on men themeselvles. Surely they would have a loop-hole to counter it affects. 
On second thought, probalby not.